I dreaded the start of this holiday season. Before it started, I couldn’t wait until it was over. For most people, the holiday season brings some grief with it. Memories of the best holiday seasons for a lot of people go back to their childhoods when all or most of their family members were still alive.
I have been in a holiday funk since my sister passed away back in 2017. My best memories were those growing up with her. I miss her more during the holidays.
This year, I lost two aunts and a first cousin, who was like a big brother to me. I was ready to throw in the towel for having a cheerful spirit this year. Grief is very real, and I know I’m not alone in suffering more during the holidays.
To my suprise, this Thanksgiving holiday brought about a different feeling. In the past, my family had a big dinner, where every member of the family brought different dishes. We used to have a great time.
But this year was different, due to the fact that most of the older members of my family are deceased, and the younger members have relocated to other states. I didn’t expect it to be a good one, but I was wrong.
My mom didn’t prepare the usual Thanksgiving meal, but instead had a fish fry. My good friend, Ranata Johnson, invited me to spend the holiday with her family, and I did, and boy did she and her husband outdo themselves with the delicious holiday meal they prepared for their family. I ended the day by spending time with my cousin and her children.
It dawned on me as the night came that I did what we all have to learn to do, and that is accept the fact that life is about stages. We must learn to live in the one we are currently in while always remembering the good memories from past experiences.
Even for those of us who cherish our memories from the past, we need to embrace the fact that usually our children and grandchildren were not around when we were enjoying those good times.
There is something to be said about accepting the beauty of new memories, while keeping the memories alive of loved ones who are not alive anymore.
I loved this holiday season because there is a new baby in my family and I look forward to seeing the different expressions that he will make upon seeing lights and Christmas trees for the first time.
There are plenty of events this season that everyone can attend to get into the holiday spirit. I challenge everyone to find somewhere to go with people who matter to you, who are still here now.
Find a reason to celebrate the season with those who bring a smile to your face, including new babies and grandchildren. If you are blessed with a job that offers holiday events, then join in, the same goes for events at your church. If you do not have a church home, then this is the season where you can attend a variety of different services at churches to get in the holiday spirit.
Embracing an appreciation for the current holiday season is not disregarding the good memories of the past. To be alive and not enjoy the holiday season that you have been blessed to see is somewhat dishonoring the gift of life, due to the fact that there are plenty of people who have passed on, as well as those fighting for their lives now, that would gladly switch places with you in a heartbeat.
I want to thank God for allowing me to be here to see the blessings of this Thanksgiving Day. I might have missed them because of grief, but I opened myself up to the things that I still have to be thankful for here.
But hey, that’s just my opinion!
We must learn to be present in the stage of life we’re in.
